Distraction-Proof® Advisor Ideas

Today we’re talking about jail time and the importance of listening.

In last week’s post, I mentioned about being a jail a chaplain, and I wanted to share a little more about some of those experiences.

I was a jail chaplain in Marin County Jail for over 15 years. During that time we had deputy shot and killed while he was off duty, responding to a domestic dispute. Jim had escorted me into jail many times. He was a neat guy – he was fun, always kidding around.

From that incident, we were told that somebody from the San Francisco Police Department would be coming over and helping the Sherrif’s Department staff go through grief counseling. Word got back to me that several deputies had specifically requested that I be the one to become involved with them during that tough time.

It was an extreme compliment that I received from them, and when I asked why here’s what I heard: I’d listened to them. I had been with them consistently with them for more than 15 years, coming in and out weekly, and knew them personally. I knew when their children were going through elementary school to middle school, I knew when they were actually being born, and so had tracked through their lives, talking with them about various aspects that they would bring to me – questions, looking for answers.

So, I’m encouraging you today to really listen well. We hear a lot about that within our industry.

1. How effectively are you really listening? Not just listening to respond, but listening to what’s going on in your client’s life.
2. Stay on track with what they are talking about, and ask more revealing questions if you can see it is important to them. This is not just idle chit-chat or “small talk” as I’ve heard some in the industry refer to it, as something to be avoided.
3. Genuiunely mean it when you talk with them, asking how things are in their lives. You can get to your agenda a little later. But what’s most important to them is what they have going on around them at that time. Ask the questions genuinely, be really seeking proper answers that you can then listen to and help them process through.

I look forward to bringing you another Distraction-Proof Advisor Idea next week.