Distraction-Proof® Advisor Ideas

AdviserBlast – Quick Tips to Accelerate Your Practice
In this issue: Are you unwittingly communicating to your prospects and clients that the most important person to you is NOT them?

Your I's may be clouding your vision! Here are tips to help you gain a new perspective and get to know your prospects and clients better. 

In advisers’ eagerness to tell prospects how they can help them, they often unknowingly reveal who is really foremost in their mind by how they begin many statements.

“I can see…” “I can do…” “I think…” “I know exactly what you’re talking about!”

See the pattern?

If you want to learn more about your clients, improve your conversation skills, and quickly appeal to people you meet, pluck out your “I”s!

Sounds grizzly, but it’s so effective in gaining perspective and getting a much better view of who you’re talking with.

Here are some examples:
          “I know exactly what you’re saying,” becomes
          “You mentioned an interesting point about… (shows them you’re listening). Tell me more about why you
            think that.”

Consider the people you hear say “Tell me more about…”  They’re usually counselors, doctors, and teachers who are genuinely outwardly focused on the person they are trying to help.

Here’s another one:
          “I manage people’s finances so they can retire in comfort,” (not too bad) becomes
          “Tell me what retirement to looks like to you. You mentioned travel; tell me about your plans for your next trip.”

All of a sudden without them realizing it, you’ve invited yourself into their plans; you’re positioning yourself as being part of their process toward reaching their goals. (And it only cost you one “I!”)

“I agree: I don’t think things will pick up anytime soon, and that’s why I…” becomes
“They’re good points you’ve made, and that’s what we’re seeing as well. You share the same approach as our clients, and we’d love to work with you.”

Having conversations this way allows you to probe deeper, flush out details, and has people talking about the most important person in the world to them – them! It forces you to listen and hear better, consider more closely what you’ll say next, and get to the main reasons for how and why the other person thinks the way he does.

Because this technique allows you to better understand your prospect, you can more effectively move forward in one of two ways: either recognize that they are not a good fit for you and so close the conversation, or see that you can truly help them and add value to their situation and so proceed to make them a client.

Here are a couple of fun exercises to practice:

1.  Listen. When you’re in your next office meeting, around a large group of people, at your next party, or at a coffee shop, listen closely to how many conversations begin with the word “I.” Note the dynamics of the conversation. When you’re talking with someone and they begin most of their sentences with “I,” how do you feel?

2.  Write. In writing emails or letters, just before sending them, scan the left hand side for paragraph beginnings. How many start with “I?” Change them where you can before sending the email. Look for this detail in the emails you receive.

3.  Speak. Try to go a day without beginning any sentence with “I.” This can be tough and will make you slow down, consider what you’re about to say, and typically begin a conversation from the other person’s perspective. Doing this at home with your children or partner is great practice.

Lose your “I”s, and see people more clearly!

– Paul

Copyright Paul Kingsman 2009
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Paul Kingsman provides financial services professionals practical tools to achieve consistent, outstanding results. As a motivational speaker and executive coach, he is a sought after expert on how to make your split seconds count. Having won an Olympic medal by only four one-hundredths of a second, Paul knows the importance of keeping focused and now teaches people how to overcome distractions and achieve their own success. His experience as an adviser for Morgan Stanley and Wells Fargo has given him an insider’s understanding of the unique business challenges faced by financial services professionals and an ability to guide his clients in implementing results oriented solutions.

To find out more about how he can help equip you or your team to achieve your own Split Second Success® through his presentations or executive coaching, email him at Paul@PaulKingsman.com

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